Sunday, October 20, 2013

sometimes . . .


sometimes when i stand on my own, without my children, i feel a little lost. exposed. i stumble for a bit before i find myself again. after all the hours and all the days of all the years meeting other people's needs, my own space is almost too much to handle. it's what i yearn for, but when i get it i'm like a rabbit in the headlights. dazzled and confused. overwhelmed by freedom. to have an impulse and be able to act on it immediately. to see a sentence through to its end. to savour an uninterrupted moment. to do what i want to do. when i want to do it. to find that i am still there, beyond all the demands and distractions of mothering. 

{sam and the big kids have been away these past few days. 
this time alone with the baby has felt like the most delicious holiday.}

6 comments:

  1. It's true isn't it? Enjoy your few days with less demands x

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  2. I totally understand this Rachel. Sometimes just having one child/baby to care for feels like a mini break. My children are often easier when they are solo...no bickering, not sharing, comparing etc! PS I am loving the Insta slideshow on your blog, it is almost tempting me to sign up :)

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  3. I know just what you mean. Sometimes I long for just a bit of time on my own, but then when I have it I feel lost. When its over I think 'oh i should have done that, and this and all these nice things!' Enjoy your baby and you time x

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  4. I can so relate to this. I feel the exact same way when I'm without my kiddies although I'm always thinking about "time out". xo

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  5. haha, this is what my mom use to say. such a bitter sweet feeling

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  6. I can totally relate... I always feel a little lost when I have rare moments of free-time :)

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